


Lucy in the Skye with Diamonds

by porter



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), D.E.B.S. (2004)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-25
Updated: 2015-03-25
Packaged: 2018-03-19 13:32:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3611886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/porter/pseuds/porter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the totally unnecessary DEBS x SHIELD crossover no one asked for. Jemma Simmons is the perfect score. Skye’s a supervillan. What could possibly go wrong?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lucy in the Skye with Diamonds

**Author's Note:**

> I own neither the plot of D.E.B.S, or the characters of S.H.I.E.L.D. But hopefully you guys enjoy the combination of them!

The morning began like any other in the S.H.I.E.L.D household; utter chaos. It was like the four residents of the house conveniently forgot that the alarm went off at 6am punctually every day, shortly followed by Agent Coulson yelling at them from the monitors installed throughout the house.

Jemma Simmons just groaned, reaching over and pulling her pillow over her head. She could hear different sounds coming from each of the bedrooms; a large crash as May tipped her latest conquest out of bed, Janet looking frantically for her gun (again), and Bobbi trying her best to get everyone up and in the car. 

Honestly, Jemma wasn’t even sure why she was still with the S.H.I.E.L.D girls after four long years. It wasn’t her plan to join a top-secret government organization; she wanted to be a scientist. She planned to go to college somewhere without having to worry about espionage or killing people. But somehow she’d received a perfect score when she completed the SAT’s (the American college system was one of the best in the world, and she’d fully intended to go to Stanford if she was accepted). Instead, she got a handler, a frankly terrifying range of over the top weaponry and four years at S.H.I.E.L.D academy. 

Groaning again, Jemma forced herself out of bed. It was never a good idea to get on the bad side of Bobbi, who was utterly terrifying when she was in a bad move. It was just three weeks to endgame, until she got to walk out of this house a proud graduate of S.H.I.E.L.D academy. She could go that long without pissing of Bobbi, couldn’t she? 

//

On the other side of town, notorious supervillan Lucy Diamond (known to a select few by her real name, Skye) was seriously contemplating destroying the continent of Australia. At the very least she was sure that doing that would shut Fitz up for at least five minutes. For some reason, he’d taken it upon himself to set her up on a blind date. Because apparently ‘brooding over a girl who broke up with you two years ago is unbecoming to a supervillan’. Ugh she was going to kick that snug little smile off his Scottish face once she figured out how she’d actually live without him. 

But seriously, a date with a Russian assassin wasn’t really in her Friday night plans. She had her Netflix queue ready to go, and had planned on ignoring the rest of the world for at least eight ice-cream filled hours. 

“Do I absolutely have to do this?” She asked Fitz as they sat in her baby blue 1962 Chevrolet Corvette outside the restaurant. She was already trying to think of excuses to cut out early.

“Skye,” Fitz focused his gaze on her. “You need to move on. I’m all for moping and even a little bit of brooding after a breakup, but it’s been two years. To be honest, I think the henchmen aren’t even that afraid of you anymore. You’re Lucy Diamond for crying out loud, you can survive a couple of hours with a beautiful woman for company.” 

“A Soviet Assassin though Fitz?”

“Hey, do you know how hard it is to find an available woman who won’t freak out when they find out their date’s a wanted criminal in the Tri-State area?” Fitz shot back.

“Fine, I’m going, I’m going,” Skye repeated as she reluctantly left the safety of the car.

“Just promise me one thing Skye. That you’ll be open.”

“Open to what Fitz?”  
“Open to love.”

Yeah, she was definitely going to have to find a way to replace him. 

The date was just as awkward as she expected it was going to be. Yelena was a little intense, and Skye had absolutely no intention of staying on this date for longer than 15 minutes. 

“So, should we order some wine?” She asked her date. The only thing that could save this date was alcohol. Lots and lots of alcohol.

“I only drink vodka,” Yelena replied, looking equal parts bored as shit and bat shit crazy. It was an interesting combination. The night progressed slowly, with Yelena giving an in-depth description about her job as an assassin. There were hand gestures, and she was just about to make a run for it, potential death by soviet assassin for bailing on their date and all, when suddenly a bracelet dropped from the ceiling. It landed in Yelena’s soup, splattering her dress with bright orange pumpkin. Her white dress.

Yep, definitely time to bail.

Suddenly about four different national security bureaus were descending on them, the plaid skirts favored by the operatives from S.H.I.E.L.D clearly visible. Smiling to herself, Skye had to admit that Fitz had been right about one thing. Tonight was definitely going to be interesting. 

//  
Jemma was having a really shitty day. 

First off, Bobbi was being a total bitch again (even though Jemma was sure that was her default setting). 

Secondly, she’d met with her supervisor about her dissertation on Lucy Diamond, and had been told that she needed to include more primary resources. Where was she going to find any of those?! Everyone who’d come up against Lucy in the last couple of years was dead. Besides, Jemma was sure it was something to do with Lucy’s parents’ deaths that led to her vendetta against Australia. After all, why would anyone hate an entire continent to the point where they were willing to sink it to the bottom of the ocean floor? It made perfect sense.

Thirdly, her boyfriend Grant was being a total dick. She’d already tried to break up with him at least three times, but he somehow always managed to win her back. Today was the final straw though. 

After all, it was their bickering that caused the bracelet to drop 20 feet into the soup bowl of one very pissed off Russian assassin. 

This was definitely Grant’s fault.

//

Skye couldn’t help but laughing slightly as utter chaos rang out around her. Diving behind the bar while pulling an impressively sized gun out of her clutch. After all, it was these moments that convinced her that she was meant to be a supervillan. The adrenaline rush was so intense.

She managed to shoot her way out from behind the bar, using one of the tables as a shield as she ran for it. Luckily all of the federal agents were such shitty shots, or never considered shooting her in the legs for some reason. Bursting out into the parking lot, she saw a door leading to the factory next time. She needed to get back out the front to where Fitz would be waiting, probably eavesdropping on her date.

Running through the stacks, Skye was too preoccupied trying to look for an exit when she ran around a corner, running smack bang into another person.   
“Oh man, I am so sorry,” She started saying as they both got up. “I wasn’t looking where I was…”

The apology is cut off as Skye notices that the person who she ran into is:  
a) Wearing a plaid skirt   
b) Pointing a gun at her head  
c) The cutest woman she’s ever seen in her life

Pulling her own gun out, she trains it on the other woman.

“Oh my god, you’re Lucy Diamond.” The other woman sounds nervous, practically hyperventilating. Skye could probably get out of there with a strategically timed kick or two, but there’s something about this woman that makes Skye want to talk to her. 

“And you’re a S.H.I.E.L.D agent. The skirt makes it pretty obvious FYI.” 

The other woman glances down at her uniform, and Skye could’ve easily taken her out within a second. Why the fuck is she still talking to this woman? 

“Yes, well I keep on meaning to talk to our handler about the outfits. They are a bit ridiculous, aren’t they?” 

Oh, so she’s British. The accent is pretty cute, Skye admits to herself. Plus, the other woman smiled slightly at the end of question, and Skye’s halfway in love already. Damnit Fitz, this was his entire bloody fault, with the whole blind date and being open to love. 

“What’s your name? Since you already seem to know mine…”

The other woman is still glaring at her slightly. It’s like an adorable puppy trying to be tough, and wow those eyes.   
“Jemma Simmons, S.H.I.E.L.D.” 

The other woman, Jemma, actually drops her gun for a moment to shake Skye’s hand. It’d be so easy to run. Like taking candy from a baby and Skye is trying really hard to remember that she shouldn’t be here, that she shouldn’t be talking to the person trying to arrest her, let alone trying to flirt with her. She should be in the car with Fitz already, laughing at Yelena’s murder impressions and stopping at the 7/11 for Slurpee’s. 

“Well Jemma Simmons, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” Skye flashes the other woman her best smile. The one that normally has her in anyone’s bed she wants within 20 minutes or less. 

Jemma looks almost startled by the fact Skye’s talking to her.

“What, you’ve never met a supervillan before?” She asks after the silence between them becomes slightly awkward. She tries the smile again, and succeeds in making Jemma take a few steps backwards. Interesting. 

“Actually, I haven’t. It’s just… I’m writing a paper on you for one of my classes. I never thought I’d actually meet you. I mean, everyone else who has is kind of dead.” Jemma’s starting to look a little nervous, and for the first time Skye resents her reputation.

“Hey, I had nothing to do with those agents dying!”

“Really? What about the train station in Los Angeles?”

“Freak accident. I didn’t do anything to that clock tower, I was just trying to buy a pack of gum!”

“The agents in Peru.”

“Ebola.” Skye deadpans, noting the look of amusement in Jemma’s eyes. She can hear someone else coming through the stacks, even if Jemma doesn’t seem to notice. 

“So why are you here tonight, meeting with a known assassin?”

“Why did you guys decide to crash my date? Do you know how hard it is to meet people in my line of work?”

“That was a date?!” Jemma looks a little shocked, which is surprising. Apparently S.H.I.E.L.D doesn’t know all of her secrets. She’s also giving Skye an appreciative look over, and wow that girl is not straight. Not by a long shot. 

Flashing her grin again, Skye decides it’s time to make her move. The other agents should be there any second, and she really doesn’t want to actually have to shoot Jemma. 

“Look, I’ve got to run, but we should catch up sometime. You can ask me a few questions about your paper if you want?” She kicks the gun out of Jemma’s hands before the agent has time to reply, turning and running down the row towards the exit. 

If Skye was sure about absolutely anything in the world, it was that she was going to see Jemma Simmons again. Even if she had to destroy a continent or two to do it.


End file.
